Yes, it's March. I realize Epiphany is normally celebrated in January, but any revelations are good ones, and this one is definitely one I would like to share.
I was working with my trainer the other evening and he was longeing Dancer. He was asking her to trot and she promptly went in to a totally unbalanced and very uncontrolled canter. "It isn't registering with her that she can go slower yet," Jeff explained. "Once she slows down, I will ask her to stop and reward her for the change in pace." Dancer, (who comes by her name honestly,I might add) finally succumbed to a slower pace after several minutes. Jeff promptly asked her to stop. "What she needs right now," Jeff said, while Dancer stood, sweaty and huffing and puffing in front of him, "is to learn how to just stand and relax."
This hit me like a brick. It was like God spoke to me through this man. The saying about horses being a mirror to your soul is spot on. I realized that this horse is more like me than I care to admit. I'm always trying to be the over achiever, trying to accomplish something every day, driving myself and always feeling like if I wasn't able to cross everything off my list, I wasn't being successful. Here was this man telling me my horse needed to , (God forbid), just learn how to slow down and "just stand there." What a moment that was! Getting permission to just stand was so liberating! I didn't have to be concerned with accomplishing anything short of simply "being." And, of course, when you are a thoroughbred who has raced for as long as Dancer has, well, it isn't such an easy feat. And, when you are an owner like me, who has had that driving force all her life to be something, make something, do something, it is a difficult thing to practice. And here we were given a goal to practice just "standing there."
I realized that my poor girl has been asked to run her whole life and that is all she knows. Breaking habits are hard, but there is living proof that it can be done. My goals have always been to develop a close relationship with my horse, and trail ride. Sometimes I feel like I am failing because I don't want to join the hunter jumper world or compete in dressage. Dancer is such a gorgeous girl, I often play games with myself and wonder if I'm doing right by her by not getting involved in these things. And then I spend time with Jeff, who affirms that I am on the right track. Stay tuned as I uncover even more revelations in my journey with this magnificent creature, my horse. Thank you Dancer, you have helped me discover so much-more than you will ever know. Thank you for helping me to realize the absolute obvious in my life. The importance of slowing down.
